THE DECEASED CHILD IN THE PSYCHIC AND SOCIAL WORLDS OF BEREAVED PARENTS DURING THE RESOLUTION OF GRIEF

Abstract

A core dynamic by which grief is resolved by parents in Bereaved Parents, a selfhelp group, is a series of transformations of the inner representation of the dead child in the parent's inner world and in the parent's social world. As the reality of the child's death as well as the reality of the parent's continuing bond with the child are made part of the socially shared reality, the inner representation of the child can be transformed in the parent's psychic life. The end of grief is not severing the bond with the dead child, but integrating the child into the parent's life in a different way than when the child was alive. This article traces the course of the inner representation of the child in the parent's inner life and social world as the parent progresses through Bereaved Parents. It concludes with some comments on the differences that should be maintained between scholarly and popular understandings of phenomena in the continuing bonds survivors maintain with the dead.